Marco...
Marco...
Anyone still out there?
Anyone still remember this old blog?
It's been over 2 years since I last blogged...2 YEARS. How does that even happen?
Well, obviously, I didn't make it to 50 dates that year. Sorry to spoil any fantasies you may have had about me hitting the love jackpot, but that didn't happen either. So what have I been doing all this time? Well, here are the cliff notes:
-More dating in LA
-Left LA (left my job)
-More dating
-Traveled in Europe
-Moved to TN
-More dating in TN
-Started work again with my old company (while living in TN)
-More TN dating in between traveling for jobs
I promise I have been dating. I haven't given up. Even though I'm pretty sure the universe has politely tried to tell me to throw in the 'ole dating towel, I continue to persevere. Or I just like the pain of it all.
I have been on lots of dates here in TN, and I have often said to friends and family that nothing has been "blog-worthy." Seems as though in LA I had more dating blunders or dating stories I couldn't wait to tell. TN dating has just been uneventful. Nothing bad, nothing good. But who am I to be depriving my loyal and ravenous fans (chuckle, chuckle) the joys of reading about dating life?
We converge here in the online community to connect, to share, and to be thankful. And I need to do my part; I'm here to make you thankful that you are not still in the dating world. However, if you are single and reading this blog, maybe we can brave the journey together. So here I am again, humbly presenting you the adventures of a 30-something navigating the murky, salty, and sometimes shark-infested waters of dating.
Tonight I had a date. It was a 2nd date actually. We went to The Pharmacy, a hip new beer garden in East Nashville that has been getting rave reviews.
In the warmer weather, they have an outside "beer garden" that looks just heavenly.
We sat inside and had beer and burgers. I mean that is what you do at a beer garden, right?
The date went fine. He is nice. The place was nice. The beer was nice. The burger was nice. It was...nice.
I honestly have no complaints about the date, but as always, it felt like something was missing. And as I drove home, I felt myself pondering a lot.
Where did I go wrong?
(we'll address this another time, thanks)
Are there really soul mates in life?
I'm a romantic, but you knew that right? I have always believed in soul mates. I want to believe in soul mates. I had faith that soul mates did exist. But I started thinking on the way home, did we just make up "soul mates" to give our love purpose? To justify who we love? To make our love feel bigger than it really is?
I don't want to believe this. I hated even typing those lines. It actually took me 5 long minutes to spit it out in text. But is it true? It's easy to believe in soul mates when you are in a relationship with whom you consider to be yours. But faith in the unknown is not always easy.
What's your stance? Do you believe in soul mates? Does every person just have one? What is your definition of soul mate?
As I sit and ponder tonight, I think I will crank up a little Journey and have Steve remind me to "Don't Stop Believing." Don't judge. But please do go ahead and laugh.
XO
Nicole
XO
Nicole
6 comments:
Um, excuse me. I'm pretty sure your TN dates have been blog worthy/ (Guy who threw up? Guy who wasn't your blind date but said he would pretend to be...yeah)
;)
And yes, soulmates do exist. However, not just in the "falling in love" sense. I do believe my hubby is who I am supposed to be with, but I also have some pretty fabulous friends that I consider my soulmates as well. (You were the first one I found).
Love you and so glad you are back at this. You are such a fabulous writer!!
I know when I met my wife, I was not looking, and in fact was just hanging out in a bar. Got dared to jump in a belt whipping contest that she was giving to her friends at the back of the bar. Once I met her, something clicked, although I barely held a conversation with her that night. She gave me her card to get my hair did at her salon, and we pretty much have been inseperable since.
Can't imagine being with anyone else. I also agree with Brooke that they also come in different forms, and is closer to the meaning of Kindred Spirits. It will happen, and it may not be apparent at first, but once you realize it, the relationship becomes like a magnet, constanlty pulled together, and miserable apart.
Till then keep writing because I also enjoy reading your stuff. :)
Craig Salmonson
To add to Brooke's mention of blog worthy posts...you also have the guy whose name you didn't know - haha!
I am happy you are back in the saddle again. (I played that song once after a break up - haha. Don't judge)
Don't put too much stock in finding a soul mate. If soul mates exist then the stars will align at the right moment. Just enjoy the ride and beware of sharks ;)
I think I just don't believe in the term "soulmates." But I'm not romantic like that! I do believe there's someone out there for everyone, though.
Initially, Erik was not who I saw myself with! We were friends, and I thought, "Hey, let's try this!" Even then I wasn't sure! But as soon as I figured out what I wanted in a mate, I realized I already had it all!
Sometimes love just has to smack you in the face, I guess!
I'm with Jennifer in that I don't like the term "soul mate." I do think that when you meet the right person, you feel some sort of special connection - you may not even recognize it as a romantic/love type connection at first, but there's something about them that hooks you in.
I don't believe in the whole "there is one person out there for each other person" philosophy. I have to qualify this viewpoint with a few others first. I believe that marriage is for life, not for a season. I know for sure that "modern society" and especially the media driven view of marriage does not match mine (and before you jump to conclusions, I don't think that any specific combination of people should get special treatment for getting married). I know that marriage for life take a lot of work. Sometimes it is not fun. Sometimes it is messy.
The concept of soulmates, that one person out there for you contradicts the fact that it takes work. It also sets people up for failure all too often. You meet "the one", "fall in love" with him or her and get married because it was meant to be. Fast forward a year or two and the new has worn off and reality sets in. That person isn't who you thought and your "the one" blinders are gone. You are not prepared to work at it because you shouldn't have to work at it if that person is "the one" you were meant to be with. Instead, you perpetuate the lie from society by dropping that person because he or she is obviously not the one you were supposed to be with, you made a mistake and you have a cop out because you should never buck fate.
I think instead that there are a number of people you can be compatible with. To stay married forever, you have to find someone that you are willing to journey with and willing to work alongside to make a life and a relationship worth having. Could you have more than one plausible candidate? Sure! You just have to choose one that has also chosen you and you have to make a covenant with each other (and with God in my case)that you will always work toward the goal of living your whole life together.
My two cents. Been a long time Nicole! Hope life is well for you.
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